Rio Beaches - Brazil Visa Service

Beaches are to Rio what cafes are to Paris . And while each beach has its own par t i~ ular traits, there are some general rules to help you take the waters like a true t arioca.

BE PREPARED First and foremost: Get a Brazilian bikini (though perhaps nut if you're male). No matter how funky or fashionably teeny your swimsuit k)uked up north, on a Rio beach itself it's guaranteed to scream gringo. And if you're thinking the figure's not quite bikini-ready, relax. In Brazil everybody and i licir grandma wears a two-piece. (Note, however, that no matter how small they lnay shrink that top, Brazilian women never go topless-that's for the heathen French.)

Second: Don't be a pack rat. If you carefully observe your fellow beachgoers you'll note that Brazilians bring neither picnic basket, nor backpack full of stuff md gadgets. Why would you bring when everything you could possibly desire is Ior sale on the beach? Blankets, inflatable mattresses, and quilts are likewise no nos. A foldable beach chair is acceptable for women; Brazilian men stand or sit on the sand. Parasols are for little kids. All you really need is a towel, sunscreen, md a little bit of cash for beer, food, and other incidentals. Third and most important: Relax. Go for a little swim, chat with the one that brung ya or the curie on the towel next door, have a beer and some snacks, and soak up those rays.

For further discussion of the more subtle social beach-going dynamics, see "Know the Beach Rules," below.

WATER CONDITIONS The beaches facing Guanabara Bay (primarily Flamengo and Botafogo) are nearly always too polluted for swimming. Thanks to a substantial current, the ocean beaches (Copacabana, Ipanema, and Barra) are much cleaner, but even so, sometimes after a heavy rain the fecal coliform count rises beyond acceptable levels. The newspaper Globo prints a daily beach report listing all beach closings. Consult that or ask at your hotel.

SAFETY ISSUES Another argument for traveling light to the beach is secu rity. It's unlikely you will get mugged on a Rio beach in the daytime, but leav ing that Discman, wallet, or pocket camera on the sand while you head off for a swim is an open invitation for someone to relieve you of your valuables. And I would advise against any moonlit beach strolls. At night the wide beach is dark and deserted; if you want waterfront views stick to the large sidewalk fronting the beach-it's well lit and often patrolled by the tourist police.

THE BEACHES Botafogo and Flamengo, now unfortunately quite polluted, are fine and picturesque places for an afternoon stroll. Off by itself out in Urca, the Praia Vermelha 4 faces out enough towards the ocean that its waters are often fine. In addition to a fabulous view of the Sugarloaf, this beach is relatively unfrequented, especially by tourists. On the other hand, it's almost completely lacking in waves.

The first of the ocean beaches to see development back in the '20s, Copaca bana remains a favorite. The wide and beautifully landscaped Avenida 1ntica is a great place for a stroll. (The wavy landscaped sidewalk mosaic is the work of landscape designer Roberto Burle Marx.) When the feet start to tire, ill up a chair at any of the countless beachside kiosks, grab a chilled coconut or a cerveja, and spend some time admiring the picture-perfect view. The area at the far end of the beach near the Forte de Copacabana is where fishermen beach their small craft; it's a good place to wander if you want freshly grilled shrimp or :Iirr seafood. For those with other fish to fry, the area in front of the Copacabana Palace around the Rainbow kiosk is a well-known gay area.

The postos (lifeguard stations) along Copacabana and Ipanema beaches are open daily from 8am to 8pm . They offer first aid (free if needed) and changing id toilet facilities for a charge of R$1 (US33¢). Postos are numbered 1 through 11 starting from Leme and ending in Leblon. Cariocas will often use them as a i, rence point instead of the cross streets.

Ipanema Beach was famous amongst Brazilians even before Tom Jobim wrote his famous song about the tall and tan and young and lovely girl he saw id sighed over. Stretching almost Am (2 miles) from the foot of the Pedra Dois iemaos to the Ponta Arpoador, the beach at Ipanema is a strand like nowhere else.

Part of the attraction does involve observing the self-confident sensuality with which the Ipanema garotas (girls) stroll the sands. (Equal-opportunity purists should note that there's an equivalent amount of male beefcake on hand-it just doesn't inspire songs or poetry.) But more than anything, Ipanema is a carnival. Watch the games of volleyball or footvollei (like volleyball, but no hands allowed), beach soccer, surfing, and wakeboarding. Forgot your bikini? Wait a moment and a vendor will stop by with one for sale-along with towels, sarongs (called kan gas in Brazil), hats, shades, peanuts, beer, cookies, Walkmans, suntan lotion, Styrofoam airplanes, Winnie-the-Pooh books, sticks of grilled shrimp, shelled coconuts, even deep-muscle massages. Claim a piece of sand on Ipanema, and all of life's essentials will come to you.

The section just around the point from Copacabana-called Praia do Arpoador-is a prime surf spot and a great location for watching the local dudes take to the waves. One of the surf schools also runs lessons for kids from the local favelas. The area around Posto 8 (opposite Rua Farme Amoedo) is Ipanema's gay section.

Further down into Leblon (still the same beach, just a different name once you cross the canal) you will find the Baixo Baby. This play area, equipped by corporate sponsors with lots of playground equipment and beach toys, is a pop ular gathering place for nannies and parents to watch their kids run around and do what kids do on a beach, play with sand.

Off on its own surrounded by mountains, Sao Conrado Beach offers some fine scenery and a (relative) sense of isolation. Its other main claim to fame is as a landing strip for all the hang gliders (asa delta in Portuguese) who leap from nearby peaks.

Farthest from the city is the beach at Barra de Tijuca. The only reason to go out here is if you're a surf-head desperate for a wave. The surfing is said to be the best in Rio , particularly right in the middle near Barraca de Pepe (Pepe's Shack).

In addition to numerous beaches, Rio is also blessed with a variety of parks. On the waterfront near Centro there's Flamengo Park , a good place to stroll in the late afternoon if you're looking for a nice view of the Sugarloaf.

Out in the other direction, just past the northern edge of downtown, lies the Quinta da Boa Vista, the royal family's former country residence, on Avenida Bartolomeu de Gusma, just a short walk from the Sao Cristovao metro stop. Though it's been a century or more since the exiled royals departed, their former country residence is as delightful now as it was when the royal princesses scam pered round the villa gardens. Designed in the Romantic style by French landscape architect Auguste Glaziou, the Quinta da Boa Vista has all the tricks of the gar deners trade: tree-lined dells, small ponds and waterfalls, a grotto, a lookout, even a temple of Apollo . The park is also home to the city zoo and the national museum (see "The Top Attractions," earlier in this chapter). Open daily from 7am to 6pm .

Closer to the city core lies the Campo de Santana, opposite the Central metro stop on Avenida Presidente Vargas. A pretty, formal park, its fence and four iron gates protect 50 species of trees, four ponds, and a grotto. The fence also encloses numerous agoutis (a bizarre-looking minicapybara), ducks, peacocks, and marmosets, as well as a large collection of stray cats that Cariocas seem to dump here. Open daily from 7am to 7pm .

Last and best, the Parque Nacional da Tijuca ( Tijuca National Park ) is a wonder. At more than 8,000 acres it's the biggest urban forest in the world and one of the last remnants of Atlantic rainforest on Brazil 's southern coast. It's i great place to go for a hike (see "Outdoor Activities," later in this chapter), plash in a waterfall, or admire the view (see "Where to Go for Spectacular ~ nd Free-Views," below). Among its more special points are the Pico de Tijuca, Lc Corcovado, the Vista Chinesa, and the Pedra da GAvea.

What's the difference between a largo and a prafa? Simple, although not really. A pracais a city square, and a largo is, well, also a city square except a largo is always bigger than a praca, except-like with the Largo de Boticario-when it isn't.

Tucked away just a few hundred meters uphill along Rua Cosine Velho from i hc Corcovado Train Station is one of Rio's prettiest squares, the Largo de Boti, named for the druggist Luis da Silva Souto who settled there in 1831 (boticario is an old-fashioned Portuguese word for druggist). It's a gem of a spot, with five gaily painted colonial houses encircling a fountain in the middle of a flagstone square. Mature fig trees overhead make for abundant shade, while traffic noise seems completely drowned out by the soft gurgling of the Rio Carioca (from which residents of Rio derive their nickname) taking its last few breaths of air before disappearing forever beneath the city streets. Very calm, very picturesque, and if you're going to the Corcovado anyway, it's well worth the 5-minute detour.

The best way to arrive in Pra5a XV de Novembro is by sea-if not on a sail ing ship from Portugal then a ferry from Niteroi will do the trick. Rio 's most important square, Praca XV is also it's most abused. Earlier generations of city planners took this main ceremonial square, ran six lanes of traffic in front of it, a freeway over the top of it, then knocked down most of the old structures used to frame the space, and erected 20-story glass blocks. Still, some of the old charm shines through (and six lanes of traffic have been sunk in an underground tunnel, which helps). To your right as you arrive, beyond a statue of Dom Joao VI on a horse, is the Chafariz do Mestre Valentim, an ornate water fountain that marks Rio 's former coastline.

Perhaps the city's prettiest square (next to Cinelandia) is the Largo do Machado in the Catete neighborhood. Perfectly proportioned, the square is dominated by the Igreja Matriz de Nossa Senhora da Gloria, a strange but rather elegant combination of traditional Greek temple, and a three-story bell tower. As an added bonus, there's a number of Parisian-style sidewalk cafes on the square's northern flank.

Also well worth a visit is the Largo de Sao Francisco de Paula in Rio 's old shopping district. There's an outdoor market on one side of the square, and on the other the huge baroque-style Igreja de S"ao Francisco de Paula.

Certain unspoken, gender-specific rules govern the public behavior of men and women on the beach at Ipanema-and I believe, by exten sion, on all Brazilian beaches. What follows is a (mostly) tongue-incheek rundown of beach-going do's and don'ts.

Sunbathing 101: The most important rule is that nothing shall come between a man and the raw, hot sand. A man who uses a beach chair, a towel, or a kanga is not a man but a gringo, and must be shunned. A Brazilian man must plant his Lycra-covered butt right down in hot white silicon, making sure his lower back and thighs are covered in sticky white grains.

There are certain exceptions. A man may sit on a sheet of folded newspaper. A man may sit on a tiny corner of a woman's kanga, pro vided the woman is beautiful and he occupies no more than 3% of the total kanga surface. A man may also stand, drinking a cerveja (beer), looking around manfully and sharing the company of other men.

A woman must sit on a kanga. Beach chairs are also acceptable. Women do not touch the sand, nor do women stand. Women do not join in beach sports such as soccer or foot volley, nor do they plod sweatily down the beach pretending to be joggers. The acceptable positions for women are lounging on their backs, lying dreamily on their bellies, or sitting cross-legged in a circle with at least three other women.

When rising from the sand-or newspaper, or corner of a woman's kanga-a man may not brush the sticky white sand from his butt. A man may not touch his butt. A man who touches his butt is not a man but a bicha (sissy) or a gringo.

A woman, when rising from the sand, must brush herself volup tuously, making sure both glutes are thoroughly massaged from waist down to lower thigh. Particular attention must be paid to readjusting the bikini bottom so that it rests comfortably between her butt cheeks. Water Frolicking 101: Men may swim. Men must swim. A man who dib bles his toes or contemplates the waves with a far-off look in his eye is not a man but a gringo, and must be shunned. Men approach the sea in a series of angry stomps, stopping at the waterline to regard the surf with a steely glare before sprinting forward and diving into a breaking wave. Once immersed, a man may swim further out, or he may body surf. A man may not play in the waves.

Women may play in the waves, turning their backs to the surf and giggling as the water breaks over them. This, however, is rare. Gener ally, a woman dips her toes, advances as deep as mid-calf, and then waits for a breaker, at which time she squats and allows the surf to immerse her bikini bottom. If this is found to be too traumatizing, a woman may also bring a cup to the beach, dip it in the frothy foam and pour the water over various parts of her body, thoroughly mas saging each part for at least 30 seconds afterwards.

Beach Flirting 101: Men and women do not enter the water together. This is not to say they do not interact. For instance, a man may approach a group of no more than three pretty women sitting cross legged on their kangas and ask them to watch his bag while he man fully attacks the ocean. Their agreement obtained, the man will then place his bag on the sand near their kangas and stomp angrily towards the surf, which he will regard with a glare all the more steely for the fact that he knows three pretty women are admiring the manful way he's attacking the elements. The women will ignore him, missing the determined plunge into the roiling surf and the angry stomp back up the beach. But at least they will never call him a gringo.